Yup… I mess up words.
Sometimes on purpose, sometimes by happy accident. Some people think I’m
mean about it.
Like, sometimes, right in the middle of perfectly polite conversations,
we’ll be talking about Kindergarten classes and how much fun the kids are
having, and I’ll say something polite, yet call it KinderNapping. Obviously,
a misnomer.
You should see the looks. “Surely you don’t mean that,” will come one reply.
“What?” I obviously don’t know I have this social disease; this making fun
of things by calling them cute names. Well, it may be a disease… but it
keeps me sane. My personal sense of humor is important to me.
“What do you mean by KinderNapping? My child is in the best program in the
state (so they tell her) and he’s well on his way to being prepared for
school. Your lovely child over there… sharing toys in the sandbox… isn’t
she in Kindergarten?”
“Uh… no. We homeschool.”
“Oh! Well, you’re quite the parent. I certainly couldn’t do that. Johnny
over there…”
“The one beating things with that stick and screaming?”
“Yes, that’s him. He’s going to what you rudely call KinderNapping and he’s
doing quite well.”
“I’m sure he is. So…. how about this weather?!”
The fact is… for a majority of children who are institutionalized by age
three (or daycared and baby-sat from birth to three THEN PreWashed and
KinderNapped) this government school care is NOT working out.
Parents are suddenly finding strangers at their dinner tables (if they even
eat together) and wondering why they aren’t anything like the things they
gave birth to thirteen years ago. In too many cases, they’re not.
What has changed them? What caused this generation to be so… different
than the last generations? I happen to think INSTITUTIONAL SCHOOLING plays a
major part in this equation. (Equation is a math term used in some schools
that still teach Old New Math.)
I’m not the only one contending that the GIGO effect (Garbage In Garbage
Out) of mandatory lifetime government schooling is having a huge effect on
generations of American children.
But it’s hard to convince well meaning and status conscious parents that
something might be wrong with their assumptions about preschool and
kindergarten.
But I do my part by putting a wrench in the works. Preschool is nothing but
a process by which parents and their children are brainwashed into thinking
they are preparing their children early for education excellence. This, I
call PREWASHING. The only preparation going on in PreWashing is the getting
the little kiddles ready for more institutionalization. Follow arbitrary
rules, do what you’re told, color in the lines, punishment for the loud and
active. Twelve more years of this, so better get prepared!!
Kids pushed into Kindergarten, where they learn such brain building things
as… finger painting, playing with toys, getting along and sharing (I’ll
admit this is useful for only children, but kids with siblings are WAY past
this.) and of course, when and how to take a nap, so the teacher can take a
break from the half day (soon to be full day) madness that is a room full of
children with WAY TOO MUCH energy to be stuffed into a room learning
educational excellence. This is called KinderNapping.
Misnomers to you maybe… sanity phrases to me. In a world where parents
have forgotten that THEY are supposed to raise their own children, not the
government, little misnomers like this are sometimes the only weapon I have
with which to rhetorically smack people over the head. It’s fun to make
people think and it’s better than hitting them with a stick.
9 responses so far ↓
1 Jeremy // Dec 3, 2007 at 10:10 pm
‘KinderNapping’… Hehe, I love it.
2 MInTheGap // Dec 4, 2007 at 1:24 pm
Great post. I really like your misnomers.
What confuses me is where you compare your kids who are behaving in a sandbox with the child that’s destructing things, but then say in the schooling environment that they erase the individuality and not let them shout and use energy.
We have two boys (4.95 and 3) that are full of energy, loud volumed, etc. and we want to homeschool, but with the amount of energy they display and the fact that they don’t want to sit still and color or do anything constructive other than play act with action figures– it makes you wonder if you can do it.
3 Heather // Dec 4, 2007 at 6:36 pm
Great post–if my parents weren’t public school teachers I would probably do the same thing. In my case I need to step lightly and allow my parents to learn through dealing with my kids the wonderful difference between homeschooling and institutionalizing children.
Minthegap? Um, could it be that your boys are behaving like proper boys of that age and that they are NOT ready to have to sit still and color for long periods of time? Boys NEED time to run and play and even if they don’t start reading until age 9 tit has been proven that you CANNOT tell the difference between a child who read at age 3 and one who learned to read at age 9 when they hit age 14. Also, with all the sit down time in the classroom only about half an hour of that time is actual teaching time. You can teach your children much more through out the day just by spending time with them (while doing other things like cleaning or even working on the computer), letting them play, and reading aloud to them. You will find that they are much more interested in actually learning when they aren’t being FORCED to sit still and be quiet. (BTW–I learned all that about 3 year old verses 9 year old as well as amount of time spent learning in my behavior management class in college while becoming a certified special ed and elementary ed teacher. Numerous studies have proven it–I know because they were listed in the back of more than one of our textbooks.)
Great post.
4 MInTheGap // Dec 7, 2007 at 2:05 pm
I’m certain that kids are different in their needs and playing time is important. In my home state, there’s a lot of regulations in regards to schooling. Not sure how we’re going to get in all in if they can’t sit and learn.
5 The Parents Zone // Dec 10, 2007 at 5:25 am
“In a world where parents
have forgotten that THEY are supposed to raise their own children, not the
government, little misnomers like this are sometimes the only weapon I have
with which to rhetorically smack people over the head. ” I totally agree with you..
Every moment spent with our child is an opportunity for both of us to grow, learn and reinforce our values.
http://www.theparentszone.com/category/child-education/
6 Robin Sampson // Dec 11, 2007 at 2:17 pm
Good post. Thanks. Keep on rhetorically smacking people over the head.
7 Amie // Dec 23, 2007 at 4:07 am
Sadly, your presumptions about half day Kindergarten are incorrect. At least partially. In my district, Kindergarten is full day… no nap-time at all. And our district “provides the service” of full day public pre-k as well. Lucky us, right? Now parents can ship their children off as young as 3 at the tax-payer’s expense. The full day pre-k fails to take into account even the children’s most basic needs. There are no snack times beyond lunch, no nap times, and only one recess. It’s designed just like k-6th. Children are expected to participate in seated learning for the majority of the day. But at least they’ll be well educated and completely prepared for the MAP tests (yes, that was a hint of sarcasm).
8 Linda // Jan 13, 2008 at 4:08 pm
Great post. I am at the end of my homeschooling years, but still like to see/hear whats going on. The drone-like thinking behaviors of our society, I believe, are a direct result of the instituitional schooling of our children. The ability to question and to critically think have been lost for so many. Thanks
9 Jeff Justice // Jul 5, 2008 at 5:05 pm
You know what… There’s one place to raise kids, and that’s family. What’s wrong with that?
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